You know, where I come from, we have this thing called clarity.  It is a feeling of satisfied lightheartedness as a burden lifted from your chest. It takes courage, humility, patience, kindness and selflessness and can only be achieved by people of utmost quality. It cannot be achieved by prideful, impatient, selfish, cowards. This thing, clarity, comes from discussing an offense with the person you have a problem with and listening. When in this situation, I have to respect them and they have to respect me. I have to look for the ways in which I was wrong and I have to admit it.  We have to resist the urge to blame, blame, blame. None of us will ever move forward if we don’t help pull our own weight. That means always doing our part which includes being wrong.

In the end, each person feels light as a feather because he or she is not carrying around the burden of bitterness any longer.  There is understanding between them because they both asked what and why the issue and reactions happened.  They are clear. And that is what clarity comes from.  So, if you have never done this before, you may find out what a delicious thrill it can be.  Warning:  it may become addictive.  Go to that person you got offended with yesterday.  Say to them "Hey, do you mind if we discuss what happened yesterday?  I don't want either of us to stay stuck in non-understanding.  I want to hear what you saw, heard and felt."  and then talk about it with an open heart and mind.

You will not believe the feeling of relief when you get everything off your chest, the happiness of being kind to the other person and the closeness you feel to them once you each understand each other.